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Over 100 million people in the USA, about 1 in 2, have a chronic illness. That means, if you are not the one suffering from chronic pain, chances are someone you care about is dealing with it silently. Too often, a chronic illness, such as fibromyalgia, or a chronic condition like back pain from a car accident, is invisible. Surprisingly, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, approximately 96% of the people who have an illness do not use an assistive device, for example, a wheelchair or cane. Pain is invisible and those who live with chronic illnesses do everything they can to look presentable, get to church, and sit through the service. As someone who lives with rheumatoid arthritis, I remember standing during worship and grasping onto the pew in front of me to balance. My knees both need joint replacements and my feet are somewhat deformed. And then the worship team began singing a song that had the lyrics, "I will stand in spite of pain." I rolled my eyes and my husband said, "It's just an expression." Of course, I knew this, but the timing was ironic. Even as I was surrounded by people in a church I loved, I still felt as though no one understood what I was going through-physically or emotionally. Churches already feel pushed to the brink, trying to fulfill all the needs that are obvious. Even large churches lack the amount of volunteers they need to rock babies in the nurseries or visit the elderly who are unable to attend the weekly service. So, if the people who have a chronic illness aren't even speaking up about their needs, then that must evidently mean that they are having all of them met, right? Pastors often ask, "If they don't ask for what they need, how can we even know what it is? It sounds to me as though they must be coping perfectly fine if they aren't calling us or asking for more prayer. They have their faith and that should be enough during the dark moments to carry them through." Let's look at some stunning statistics: - We usually assume the chronically ill are the elderly, but 60% of people who live with illness or daily chronic pain are between the ages of 18 and64. - 75% of marriages where one of the spouses have a chronic illness end in divorce - When you are chronically ill, depression is 15-20% higher than it is for the average person - Many studies have found that physical illness or uncontrollable physical pain are major factors in up to 70% of suicides.* So there is a cause for concern. Whether a pastor or church leadership can see it or not, those church pews are packed with ailing bodies. And the suffering bodies are filled with broken spirits. These are the broken-hearted that Jesus promises blessings for. But the question is, if people aren't talking about their pain, how do you know how to reach out to them? How can you understand their needs? 1) First, take the time to conduct a survey about the needs people may have that they are not vocalizing, especially if you are a large church where people may be more reluctant to talk about their illnesses (or lack of healing thus far). In a recent Barna group study, it was found that larger churches were the least likely to mention congregational care ministries as a priority (Church Priorities for 2005 Vary Considerably). In your survey ask questions such as, "If we provided a van for transportation to church events, would it increase your attendance? If our service was online as a web cast, would you listen or watch it when you were too ill to attend? Do you know who to contact at our church if you have personal needs for personal assistance (especially when your condition is chronic, not acute)? Would having the song lyrics available on paper be easier for you to see than just having the overhead? How could we make the service more comfortable for you, for example, are the seats comfortable?" Sit down with a group of people who manage daily chronic pain and ask them for a wish list. Then prioritize what your church can do immediately and what should be longer term goals. (2) Provide a small group/Bible study setting for those with illness. For example, Rest Ministries, the largest Christian organization for the chronically ill, has a small group program called HopeKeepers which provides a wide variety of resources, Bible studies, and leader support for this purpose. You may find that although people enjoy the small groups they are in, they can start to feel that talking and praying about their illness week after week is a burden to others in the group. They often enjoy having a specific place where everyone "speaks the same language" and even giggles at the same jokes. It can be invigorating. And if only a few people come, that's okay. It brings people comfort to know the church has this oasis when they need it. (3) Invite guest speakers who have physical disabilities or live with chronic illness. There are amazing people that speak at churches, sharing their testimony and a wonderful message. By letting them be on stage and reveal what God has done in their lives, despite physical challenges, lets people in your church who are ill see that you do in fact recognize their needs. It reminds them that you care, and perhaps most importantly of all, that you believe that people with physical challenges are still worthy to be used by God (a message few hear from their church). Speakers such as Dave Dravecky, Lisa Copen, Joni Eareckson Tada, Nick Vujicic, and many others, minister to the masses, not just those with disabilities. (4) Consider adding a parish nurse to your staff, especially if your church body has a lot of seniors. Marquette University College of Nursing, which has an excellent parish nursing program, reports there are about 6000 parish nurses in United States. Many retired nurses are finding this area of ministry appealing and most parish nurse certification can be given by many hospitals. The parish nurse position description depends on your church's needs and goals. For example, they may go to homes to monitor diabetes or high blood pressure of church members, organize walking groups, health fairs and screenings, and even help out with the chronic illness small group. The role of the parish nurse may be a better choice than a disabilities coordinator, depending on your church's demographics. This person would help cover the disability ministry needs and work closely with the congregational care pastor. (5) Stock up on caring resources that are available for people to borrow. Lots of people with chronic illness are on a fixed-income but they truly want the encouragement. Your church library should carry your many books on living with chronic illness such as "Why Can't I Make People Understand?" or "Beyond Casseroles: 505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend," by Lisa Copen or Joni Eareckson Tada's amazing book, "When God Weeps." Purchase a few subscriptions to magazines such as "HopeKeepers", "Guideposts" and even "Fibromyalgia Aware." Don't forget books on tape, audio presentations and large-print materials whenever they are available. Put up flyers or have brochures available about chronic illness or disability ministries. These include Joni and Friend's "Wheels for the World" program or Rest Ministries' annual outreach, "National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week." Recruit a volunteer to assemble binders of information about national ministries and local resources. Also include Christian organizations, magazines and newsletters on topics of interest to Christian seniors, those who live with disabilities and illness, and caregivers. (6) Finally, and perhaps most importantly, keep in mind that people with illness want to help serve. Not just be served. Proverbs 11:25 says, "He who refreshes others will himself be refreshed." For example, if a woman with a chronic illness explains that she must resign from teaching Sunday school, make sure she knows that she is welcome to serve in other ways when she is ready. Though she no longer is physically able to teach four-year-olds, she may discover that she loves writing notes to people who have just been diagnosed with a chronic illness. A man may discover that he prefers mentoring another man with a chronic illness one-on-one, instead of leading a weekly Bible study. Let people know that you value wounded healers and that your church believes that God comforts us "so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God" (2 Corinthians 1:4). About twice a month someone tells me that they went to their pastor with a request to start a chronic illness HopeKeepers ministry and they were told, "Come back when you are healed and then we will talk. You can't very well minister to others with illness when you aren't even healed yourself." The broken hearts that arise from these comments is unbearable. It's devastating to feel like God is using your illness for His glory and then be told you are no longer useful to the church-or even to God-until you are healed. In Luke 14:21 Jesus shares a parable of a great banquet. When the host's hospitality is turned down by his friends he responds by commanding, "Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind and the lame." This is still a mandate to us today, but we must remember that to provide a place where we offer hospitality, we must first "go out" into our own pews and provide a place of refuge; as we make small changes in our church to create that oasis for people with illness, then these people in our church will naturally be comforted. And then they will go out into the community with open arms of understanding and minister to others along this journey.
By: Lisa Copen
Get a free list of 200 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend from "Beyond Casseroles" by Lisa Copen when you signup for to HopeNotes invisible illness ezine at Rest Ministries. Lisa founded Invisible Illness Week
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