I'm Happy, You're Happy....but What Is Happiness?

A female friend sent me a private message not long ago and asked me my secret to happiness. There was a long pause. She typed the sound (in text) of the "Jeopardy" theme song in between final jeopardy as if I were running out of time for the answer.

The truth is, I had to think about it. Growing up, I was known as morose, sad, and moody. What was this "happiness" thing. To be honest, I thought Rowan And Martin were onto something when they sarcastically said, "May the bluebird of happiness fly up your nose".

Because all people and families have issues and problems, same as me, I cannot deem myself any happier than anyone else. I am just happier when I do things that are healthy for me. Little things often do it. Calling or visiting a sick friend. Getting on the floor and playing with my pet. Working on my cartoons or cartoon products. Knowing a wonderful woman loves me, possibly for the first time ever. All these things add up, even knowing, as the song says "Dust in the wind". So I learn to live in the moment, for today. Projecting is painful and not very productive for me.

Our founding fathers even understood the importance of hapiness and penned it in the Constitution of our country "...and the pursuit of happiness". They could have said it differently, like "and the right to be happy". But being happy is not a right. Nor is being sad. A right speaks of an action that will bring us to a new place. And that action is, as our founding fathers knew, pursuing happiness, not just sitting down and being happy. It is not against the law to do that, it is simply not living in reality and they knew it, so they wrote a little instruction manual (in The Constitution) on the importance of that pursuit.

"To thine own self be true", said William Shakespeare. That statement alone showed how far ahead of his time he was, long before psychiatry and antidepressants ever existed, custom designed for those who had never been true to themselves. Shakespeare knew, being true to oneself, is a key element in being happier. I didn't say happy, though it could result in that. But I don't know a person who is true to him or herself who is not at least a bit cheerful. I may have even taken the phrase way to literally. I still think about it daily as decisions have to be made.

Given Shakespeare's famous saying, let's why not list how often we mess with our own well-being happiness, or make certain it does not happen. We take jobs which are terrible but pay well. We spend with our credit cards like their is no tomorrow to feel a gaping hole. We do not like our co-workers and they do not like us. We do not like our boss and he does not like us either. We marry too young and have kids. Maybe a good friend did the same first so we followed suite. We were not ready, or the opposite. We decided not to get married as we grew up in an unhappy home, and we would "show our parents with sweet revenge" (That was my modus operandi for many years). Suddenly it occurred to me they didn't care what I did as long as I was in the pursuit of happiness. Both my parents have been dead over a decade. I miss them. I do not live for them, but I cherish their memories, the good and the bad.

I learned that thought the book was great, never to take "Everything I Ever Needed To Know I Learned In Kindergarten" too literally. Yes, it offered some pragmatic lessons and great analogies, but the most powerful lessons I have learned, to transcend from sadness and depression, have been mistakes made in adulthood. I make less of them now, but I still make them. I don't get all upset when I do. I realize there is a lesson about to be learned.

I try to think of the great DeNiro line (to his psychiatrist Billy Crystal) in the movie "Analyze That". "It's a process, doc". Of course out of context it is not funny, but in the movie it's a scream. And life and happiness, getting more of both, is, indeed a process, and can be a painful one at that. But the risks are worth the rewards.

Simple is good. Complex is not so good. It is human nature to like drama. Leave it for the movies. Live your life more simply and experience more happiness. It is really that simple. Sounds cliche but I can guarantee you, in my half-century here on earth, I have an inkling of wisdom in that area.

Life is short. Do the work you love, regardless of the money. Study it hard. Research. Get to know it and love it. The money really will follow. If it doesn't, learn yet another vocation of interest until you are wearing the right mask. Career and money can contribute greatly to happiness, but money itself, for the sake of an uninteresting career, leaves one empty.

I am not saying one has to work in the world of cartooning or humor to be happy. But it doesn't hurt to expose oneself to it.

Dr. Bernie Siegel who wrote a best-seller in the 1980's, Love, Laughter, And Healing helped me a great deal when my mother was dying of cancer. I called him. He claims in his book that he had incurable brain cancer and exposed himself to many comedy movies, videos, cartoons, and sitcoms. He had no idea if it would help heal him, he just felt his mortality and wanted to laugh a bit. Within a few years, his brain cancer was in remission and he still is alive and writing two decades later. I have discussed this with him on several occasions and he offered up some of the greatest advice I ever had, expose your mom to humor. I went to the video store daily and found a different comedy film every day and we watched it together. It also brought me closer to my mom. She lived about four years longer than they expected.

Aside from Dr. Seigel's advice, a Gary Larson Far Side exhibit I saw in Washington, D.C in 1986 maybe had the most impact on me to demonstrate just how important humor is in our culture. Dr. Seigel taught me how healing it is. Knowing I am in a field that makes people laugh and feel healed, offers a great deal of joy into my own life. So helping others is an action in my pursuit of hapiness.

So please, give the gift of laughter today, whether its a joke, a book, a cartoon gift, or comedy video. Pass It Forward, as they say.

By: Rick London

The Internet's most visited cartoon is Londons Times www.londonstimes.us by Rick London. He also has numerous cartoon Londons Times Cartoon Gift Stores which he feels help spread joy One of Rick's Largest Funny Store is is Top Cartoonist Rick London Shares Ways To Become Happier

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